The Big Question:

[richard meyers]

Amida is the context in which we all live. This ‘Being Without Measure’ that all life unfolds within. Consider the dinosaurs, some of which stood the height of 3 double-decker busses; or the infinitely tiny virus, multitudes of which dance beneath our skin. All the breathing in and out of existence balanced upon Amida’s fingertip. All of which is innocent of malice. Only the Human animal and what it brings to the banquet gives us cause to pause.

When I invoke the Name Buddha, Amida, Christ or God, I do so tentatively, as shorthand pointing toward what is Sacred to my understanding - the quickening source of life itself in all its forms.

We live in a time of war, in a time of hanging on to wealth at any price. What a futile misuse of creativity and resources we spend on warfare. Weapons of mass destruction indeed. A genii let loose, and sold to the highest bidder.

The very matrix of life itself is in jeopardy and we need to admit our complicity in this. The image of the Last Supper comes to mind as the disciples question Christ with regard that particular sell out - Is it I Lord? We are all involved whether we like it or not.

Recently within our London Sangha, we considered the nature of koan in daily life and what our particular conundrum might be. We went on to reflect upon how what is personal might well be common to other people and in fact spiral out into society as a whole.

Newsreaders speak of ‘unrest’ (what a euphemism!) in the Middle east, the so-called Arab Spring, as we hear about it on the television, seems like an unfolding nightmare.

There are no lack of koans in daily life - one begins to take form in my mind. In many respects this appears to be most important question of all and one I shall try to give shape to in a moment.

What does the Buddha make of Syria and the slaughter happening there? What does God make of this mayhem; the bombing of residential areas; the homes within which entire families cower? Compared to us all other forms of life appear benign.

Many of us are disturbed by all of this, how could we not be? The loss of life, the terror, evokes prayer and nembutsu. How to hold this uncertainty, this apprehension, this sadness we all must feel, sooner or later? Our task is to attempt to alleviate it, but also to place this pain in a position of open receptivity to what still remains lovely in life, to Grace. There is love; there is kindness and contrition and forgiveness; there is compassion. The Human Heart is here still. When Frederic Franck calls us to “Remain Human at All Cost”, this is what he means.

This then, is the big question - In the midst of suffering and loss are we still able to find fulfilment and joy in life. Ultimately, within the Holy is there such a thing as the Unholy? If our hearts are open Amida’s light is free to flow in and flow out. And we are there equally for ourselves and for other beings human and non human.

[Robert McCarthy]

you have put this in a very lovely way Richard. we cant fully trust anyone, including ourselves yet love opens our hearts and lets us risk all for it;  to a teacher, a lover, friend, family. there has been one constant through my life, love is real. this is the experience of this reality that has our best interest at heart.  thanks for this reflection.  Namo Amida Bu

[richard meyers]

Just to return to the image of the rug: it offers rich pickings! It’s fascinating the way language seems to connect up with itself. There is a tendency to bring to others words our particular viewpoint; the contact lenses we wear; the glasses we darkly see through, are shot through with our take on the world. How lonely this can feel! We all long for genuine contact, we all long to be met by another.

How attached we are to our opinions (to continue with the rug idea), to the weft and the warp of our perceptions, to the slant we put on things. How much we struggle with handing all this over to faith or to what is Other; let alone to another human being. The truth is I don’t fully trust anyone; not that I exactly distrust them either. In the main I do my own rug pulling, we all do, yet still hope for the arrival of someone or something adroit enough to do the job for us, once and for all. This is unlikely to happen - so what are we left with? The idea that has the most currency for this particular foolish being (continuing in his foolishness)--is that outside of all of our wishing and hoping, there exists a reality that has our best interest at heart. This to me is Amida, there is so much that is miraculous in life, such as our ability to converse with good friends on ning, enjoy the emerging Spring, or a good belly laugh, or music - what a gift from Amida that is!

[Katrien Sercu]

I wrote this sentence in my firstt reply here: " I take your question with me in life, Richard and I'll try to not close my heart when pain comes, to wait what happens..."

So, after 3 days thinking about it and living with an open heart and forgetting it again, I see how quickly my heart closes oneself and how my mind gets buzy by that, by this reflexe! It's amazing. Some impressions, even not painful and my heart gets closed, without any consciousness! It's good to be aware of that and to try in some moments to open again my heart, trusting that this habit can change.

How the body can be contraproductive on the mind and the spirit! But, I know that this is a conditioned reflexe, not a natural reflexs...and when things get conditioned, they also can become de-conditioned, if this word exists? Hello to all here!

[Robert McCarthy]

Is this even a quicker reply Richard.  you have a summer haze and we have an autumnal drizzle.  we have autumn here from march 1 but i think you still have three weeks of winter.

enjoy your haze and visiting cuckoo, but dont forget the big question for too long. and be very careful about whose rugs you stand on. hope you are travelling well.

[richard meyers]

Hi Mat,

As I write there is a beautiful summer haze outside, whether 'Sumer is ichumin in' remains to be see,  But for now this particular cuckoo sings 'lhudely'!  Modgala told me that you were coming to London in April.  Annoyingly, Ruth and I are away until 8th of that month.  So we will have to wait yet a while for our catch up.  Certainly would have been an approriate time for us wholly foolish ones to meet up.  Speaking of which I'm still trying to sort out exactly what Amida is about, rather than just saying the nembutsu - I suppose it's become a sort of koan for many of us.  I get more subtle about it by the day - only to get the rug pulled from under my cleverness!  Namo Amida Bu! 

[Mat Osmond]

Many thanks Rich. I have nothing to add, but you beautifully sow together many things also on my mind - even if it is easily distracted and bored. When you speak of Amida, I feel that is the Amida I recognise...that is how I perceive Amida.

Very sorry to be missing this weekend. Will you be around for Holy Fools in a month? Am planning to be up at Sukhavati Sat/Sun that weekend. Would be great to catch up.

Namo Amida Bu

Mat

[richard meyers]

Hello again Rob,

I'm always surprised at how quickly you can get back to us northern hemisphere types - I imagine you would be asleep, being on the other side of our world.  Hope things go well with you and your family.

All best, Rich

[Robert McCarthy]

terrible things are happening all around us and often they take on a huge momentum of their own and they are ignored. These are complex outcomes of all the conditions and we do well to get some understanding of what is happening. mara is no demon though, just us.

Fulfillment does seem to me to be a state we desire to live in. i looked at two other words we use here, enlightenment and meaning. These also seem to be states. But to me they are as you say Richard, fleeting, transitory. I can feel the beauty of the universe say it is all ok, I can feel an awakening, I can get a feeling that my life has a useful meaningful side. These things come and go.  We get into trouble with them when we want to hold them, own them, identify wuith them.  They are not states, at least in my experience.

[richard meyers]

Hi Rob and Katrien,

Thanks for your comments.  Rob I can see your point about Unholy (I almost took that sentence out as it is loaded with all sorts of association from other traditions).  But I shall let it stand and just see what it conjures up.   I find it hard to see the extreme suffering we witness as anything other than in extreme terms.  Evil is a word that I myself have an aversion to - too many Dennis Wheatly books as a kid!.  I have come to see it, not as a living force in the universe, but as an absence of love.  This does however have the potential to take on a momentum of its own - as in the rise of right-wing politics, scapegoating others and sweeping people along with it.  This is something dangerous to ignore.  The young are particularly susceptible to this. 

'Fulfillment' - is of course, transcient - I never said it was fixed, but what draws us to the Three Jewels of Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, if not the quest for a spiritual home and the sense of fulfillment that brings?

My sense of the Universe is that though essentially benign - we are here, we are sustained by beauty, this is a medical truth as well as an aesthetic one - largelly the context is neutral and it is the human heart that brings Amida to birth.  Yes, words can get us into all manner of unsought situations.  I watched a wonderful documentary last night, David Hockney: the Art of Seeing.  In it he suggests that we even see different things when looking at the same bit of landscape, given our history and sense of things.  Words and concepts are equally slippery.  In the end can we really do any more than voice an opinion?   As for Scrabble I lost to Ruth again recently! Namo Amida Bu.          

[Robert McCarthy]

I react to terms like unholy and evil. These words take actions out of our midst, label them as outside of ourselves as an absolute that needs to be isolated and destroyed.  So I am happy to say that love is real but evil is not real and the love is absolute, not conditional. And to say that everything flows from this love, somehow or other.

We too easily make love into something abstract in our minds and too easily forget it is an experience. I also know the experience of anger,  greed, jealousy. When I notice i see these reactions in response to disappointment.   I see them born of self, of no enduring quality.  Love, the nurturing, caring, wise lifeforce is just there. It is not born of self for sure, it feels unborn even, as the Sutras use this term. 

Life doesnt take us anywhere, to some qualities that we are deserving of.. Maybe we will live largely ignorant of love, maybe we wont be fulfilled, maybe others will call us evil.   I dont like also using the word fulfilled RIchard for the  reason you ask of how to be fulfilled in world of such manifest suffering.   Even to say one is satisfied with life  is in a sense ignoring others pain.  Maybe we do need to be very careful with language, there is enough to respond to without setting up new goalposts that cannot be reached.    We certainly experience joy and pain, but what is this experience of fulfillment. It seems like something that may settle on us eventually; but even if so life will move us from there to somewhere else. it just flows. its like a scrabble game!  Namo Amida Bu