On appreciation

[Susthama]

As a bombu Buddhist, I have attained nothing that will get me closer to supreme awakening. How can I? I am an ordinary earthly being, proud of so many things and pathetic in so many other ways that compound karmic consequences exponentially. What does all this mean anyway? Where would I be now if I had entered the stream and had a modicum of spiritual accomplishment?

To appreciate and value others is what I've learned from other members of my sangha. Sometimes, it can be hard for bombus to feel things deep in the heart and so rather than be moved by so many raw and gut wrenching feelings it is easier to guard ones feelings by activity and avoidance. And so what is appreciated then? I would hazard a guess and that what Amida appreciates is unfathomable and therefore includes both the painful existence of our fragile life and also the flourishing of human activity that brings us comfort.

In the past week, I've spent most of the time sitting and talking to other members of the Order, listening to what others have been doing as well as utterances of appreciation. In my mind, this simple act of listening and appreciation is what bombus value and regard with utmost respect: the connection and fellow feeling, the grace that is bestowed on us and the ordinary fears and frustrations.

[Katrien Sercu]

By this talk here, i remember the talk about selflove in 'love and it's dissappointmen': the western idea that we first must love ourselve, before we can love another. This seemed so normal, but by thinking about myself, giving selfish love to myself, i isolate myself out of the whole; i disconnect and i' not open for love and light that is here. The isolation in selflove gives the pain of loneliness. Connection - by listening, appreciation- gives love, joy and rest and starts by love, joy and rest.
It's funny that it takes so much time to feel this simple reality....and to forget it again and again...until it simply comes back: love and joy as a source, attainable in connection with others in life, touching the heart that get warm by that.

[richard meyers]

I respond and relate to what is being said here by all. More than half my life spent in quest of clarification of who I am and what to do with my life. (If only I could figure things out!) This is why the tiny leaflet re 'Buddhism for Foolish Beings' hooked me. Straight off - my god that's me! Right now I see it as extending a hand of kindness to myself as well as others and being here unjudgementally. Also gratitude for the love for the beauty and sustaining that holds and gathers all in empathy and compassion. Still I struggle and make mistakes, omitting to do what is considerate and in my more awake moments would do. Isn't this all of us? Bombu human beings with vulnerable hearts and good intention, beautiful in our imperfection. Our human-heartedness is what counts finally I believe, not whether we call ourselves Buddhist or Christian or whatever.
I encountered the statement by Roshi Joan Halifax recently,that we should keep our backs strong and our fronts soft! I love the implication of being open to whatever we encounter, yet with a practice that supports us too.

Thank you for the posting.

[Robert McCarthy]

just to clarify soft tissue work susthama- i do myotherapy- muscle therapy, like physiotherapy a bit, but some chinese practices thrown in. but i dont like the thinking part, so its become healing massage

[Tara]

Your post reminded me of the power of the therapeutic relationship, in that simply being authentically appreciated and valued for who we are, regardless of what we present or how we behave, is healing on a deep level. Your post and your appreciation are much appreciated!

[Susthama]

oh? soft tissue treatment? I hope it went well.

yes - such healing is heartfelt and the benefits are good and lasting.

[Robert McCarthy]

i have just come back from a soft tissue treatment and in our talk the woman said how she drives family and friends crazy because she is always drawn to stop and help anyone she sees in any sort of trouble- broken down cars, someone loooking distressed. well i repeated what dharmavidya said recently, that such help can ease suffering a bit, but the real healing is to the heart, the faith the receiver feels that someone cares. the woman nearly jumped off the table in affirming this, in such joy.