Sumaya's Page

the peace coming from this place,
I got to know you -
precious, sublime, danger, boring, full, empty,
I can’t quiet my mind obsessed with many things,
another attempt of taming it doesn’t succeed,
it is again over;

my lonely heart, my friend,
beat more
despite my-self,
despite my world

I forget about you,
you full of cracks,
your foolishness served on the plate in front of you,
and you had accepted it and asked others for help.

I forget about you,
tears are covering my face,
you are still here,
as well the love which you received,
how I could forget about you?

who wants to be protected in a way suitable for him
who wants to be safe and lazy
who wants to be in a control of the world, of the others

there is no future for this child

this is sad, this is not sad
this is disappointing, this is opening
this is me, this is not me

…. nothing changed, everything changed ....

24 Hours chanting was wonderful, it seemed to be very short, after the end I wanted to start again … but I knew it was just attempt to escape from myself.
Silence in the end …. all nembutsu in the air materialised to thick, fluffy white blanket which was falling on all people in the meditation hall.

Bodhi retreat was very full, a lot of practice, seminars, dharma talks, dharma discussions and ceremonies. I was lucky, I took active part in two of the… Continue

Today we had a retreat day. We were thinking of Honen’s exile. We did a lot of practise.

Very special day, like the air we are breathing. Morning nei quan focused upon the air, upon our dependency on the air. Afternoon nei quan brought other layer to it. What does the air, like all objects around us, mean to us? There are two options: attractiveness of the object and spiritual danger. The first one reflects how the object supports us, how we are dependent on the object, the second includes all… Continue